Is it Rude to Act Lady-Like?

When you were a little kid, was it ever your dream to be a princess? You would go everywhere in a fancy dress and have a prince hold door for you and pick you up at your castle in his fancy carriage. Maybe as you became old enough to date, you wished that a guy would treat you like a princess. We would see a boy we had a crush on pass us by in the hall and dreamed that some day he would be holding his car door open for you. As we all know, being treated that way in middle school and high school didn’t come easy. The age most of us grew up in, acting lady-like was no longer preferred. There are certain unwritten rules in society now for getting into a relationship that require…well, less morals.

It seems as though the art of being lady-like has become a thing of the past. No one abides by these guidelines unless you’re a member of the royal family. I recently came across a list of lady like traditions for the dating lady in an article called, “21 Lost Lady Traditions That Still Apply Today” on While it was an interesting read, it seemed like some of the things on the list sounded, well, rude and snobby. So, is being lady-like a rude thing to do?

I’ll let you decide for yourself:

  1. Don’t call him, he’ll call you. A lady knows that she deserves to be pursued and does not do it or him. If you are in the position that you have to initiate contact in order to communicate, then you should know that you are not dealing with a gentleman and can move on.
  2. You don’t meet a guy anywhere. He comes and picks you up, especially on the first date. It can be inconvenient, but is it your job to make dating you convenient? No. The last thing you want to be is convenient. However if you are meeting someone in person for the first time, meeting in a neutral location is a smart, safe move. Always honor your intuition.
  3. Curfew… Mama always said nothing good happens past 10 o’ clock and she’s pretty much right. So set the time you need to be home in advance and let your gentleman know about it ahead of time.

In my opinion, I honestly do not see anything wrong with acting lady-like or being treated like a lady, and yet I wonder if these examples here can be easily tolerated today in the dating scene. It’s becoming more difficult to find guys who are willing to go the extra mile and do things like picking you up for a date, respecting your time and not stringing you along. So is it wrong to have them do these things? Would we be asking to much by acting lady-like?

I can understand how someone could look through this list and see it as a problem with gender equality and all that. After all, it is the twenty-first century, right? Why should these guidelines of the past apply to the independent women of today? As I read though the list again, I came to see these as guidelines for respect. They are tests not only for how you respect yourself, but how the people you choose to be with respect you. If a guy can’t honor and respect the rules and standards you have set for yourself, then he definitely isn’t going to respect you. These rules might chase away all the crummy guys and make it easier to find the good guys.

Maybe some of these traditions of being a lady are old-fashioned, but that doesn’t mean that they aren’t okay to use in the present day. We are all free to make our own decisions and set our own standards. You don’t have to come from wealth or royalty to be treated as such.

Free access to everything sorority