Big/Little

What Should You Actually Look for in a Big?

Every semester young ladies come through recruitment looking for a group of women that they can fit in and flourish with. Getting that bid seems like best thing that will ever happen to you, but getting a Big is so much more exciting and memorable. **I do vaguely remember my bid day, but I can recount every detail of my Big/Little night. ** Choosing a Big sister is probably the most important decision that any new member makes during her pledge time with her sorority. Unfortunately, new members do not always know what to look for in a Big sister. Another unfortunate problem arises when active sisters who desperately want a Little push these girls into thinking that they are a good match without considering what is best for the new member.

What Should You Actually Look for in a Big?

Your Big should not just be the girl you love partying with, or the best crafter, or the girl who dresses cute every day. I have a great relationship with both my Big and my Little, and I honestly think it is because we knew what we were truly looking for in a Big sister. New members, look for these qualities, and potential Bigs, strive to be these things:

What Should You Actually Look for in a Big?

  1. A role model
  2. Someone who picks you up when you’re down
  3. A support system
  4. A confidant who keeps your secrets
  5. A nonjudgmental listener
  6. Someone who can dish out both tough love and gentle guidance
  7. A protector who knows when to let you make mistakes
  8. A loyal comrade who stands by you when you make those mistakes
  9. A friend
  10. Someone who gives more than they take
  11. A fun-lover
  12. Someone who isn’t jealous when you makes new friends
  13. An organizer
  14. Someone who values honesty
  15. An independent woman
  16. Someone who complements your personality
  17. A responsible sister
  18. Someone you feel comfortable enough to be yourself around
  19. A woman who is proud of who they are
  20. Someone who is the same Tuesday morning as Saturday night

Obviously this is not an exhaustive list, but these are the things that I looked for in a Big and that my Little found in me. My relationships are not perfect, and I do not discount that many other Big/Little pairs have very different, very healthy relationships. The most important thing about being a Big is working on your friendship with your Little to ensure you’re both happy and inspired to better.

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