Big/Little

True Life: My Little Ghosted Me

Dear Little,

I’m not really sure what happened. I don’t know if you’ll ever stumble across this post, because you seem to want nothing to do with the Greek community, but if you do, hopefully it will inspire you to reach out again. Let’s rewind to the beginning.

You are the perfect sassy, smart, fun-loving addition to the family. You fit in perfectly with my big and me and perfectly in Theta. You took two littles of your own, creating baskets that you slaved over and let me help you with. I bought you letters. My boyfriend made you shirts. We had drunken heart to hearts and late night trips to Michael’s. Then something weird happened – you started ghosting Theta.

You stopped going to anything – chapter, sisterhoods, mandatory workshops, Greek week, and even parties at your favorite fraternities. Started saying that suddenly Theta “wasn’t for you” and that you weren’t a “sorority girl” – that you didn’t have time for sisterhood anymore and didn’t want to come up to the house and hang out. I tried and tried and tried again, texting you daily, texting you when you didn’t show up to events, and encouraging other sisters to reach out to you. And they did. We invited you to come to lunch, go out with us, go shopping… and you ignored the texts. Almost every single one of them.

What you don’t know is how much this hurts me. It’s been a while since you ghosted the sorority that means so much to me, but it still hurts to see you pretend that you never wore these letters and don’t know your own sisters that were initiated beside you. I love Theta, and I wanted you to love it too, so I gave you just about everything I could give as a Big and as a friend. I don’t know what happened or when you started to distance yourself, but it’s affected many more people than you think.

I am sorry for whatever made you want to leave, and I want you to know that if you choose to let your sisters back into your life, we will be there for you. Lean on us.

Theta love and all mine,

Your Big

If you are a sorority woman wishing to deactivate yourself, remember that you have options before leaving your sisterhood. Give your sorority one last final try – do everything, spend tons of time with your sisters, and be ALL IN, before you decide that it truly isn’t for you. Despite the stereotypes, most sororities have a huge variety of women who call themselves members – chances are, you can relate to at least one of them. Remember the reason you joined!

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